My Journey Thus Far

Hi all, I’m back! Wow, it’s been quite some time since I’ve been here. I thank you all for coming back and seeing where I’ve been in this journey God has laid before me. So just a little catch-up, as y’all know, I was born again back in May of 2018. In that season, my severe alcoholism had me cry out to God the day after Labor Day and ask Him to save me from that horrible addiction. God heard my prayers and answered them immediately overnight. I woke up May 28. 2018 and the complete desire to drink had been taken away from me completely. My deliverance from alcoholism was truly an act from God, I had no urges, craving, tremors, withdrawals, nada! Well, as I’ve come to learn how God works, I realized He wasn’t about to stop at just the alcohol deliverance, shortly after, God started speaking into many other areas of my life He wanted to heal me from, my sexuality (having lived as an openly “gay” man the past 24+ years) was next on His healing list. For the first time in my life, the scales of identity in homosexuality had been removed from my eyes as I saw that my identity was found in my Creator Jesus Christ and NOT my sexuality. “And immediately something like scales fell from his eyes, and he regained his sight. Then he rose and was baptized;” Isaiah 35:5. This new revelation was completely new, exciting, and to be honest, a bit scary. To know in my soul that the life I had lived the past almost 25 years was a counterfeit to my true calling was one thing, but to live that new life out was going to take a radical boldness like I had never lived before. Being bold and radical for the world I was accustomed to, and God knew exactly how he would use that radical boldness for His glory. I would later discover the consequences of radical boldness without radical obedience, two very different sides of the same coin. The scales had been removed from my eyes and I found myself boldly sharing my new found TRUTH, my testimony with anyone with an ear to listen, especially if it brought God glory and hope to others. And while I was on fire the first 2 years after being born again, I found myself stumbling back into old patterns, behaviors, and strongholds for the first time in my Christian walk. I was not aware, let alone prepared for the unseen spiritual warfare that came with living a Holy life.

From that stumble 2 years after surrendering my life to God in 2020 and into this past Summer of 2022, I encountered spiritual warfare like never before. I thank God that He strategically put people in my life to teach me how to fight in the spiritual ( prayer, fasting, deliverance, covering, interceding, taking thoughts captive, using the Word, etc.) but that did not make the attacks any easier to bear. Spirits of lust, perversion, sabotage, low self-esteem, etc… came at me full force and I found myself in a cycle, much like a hamster wheel, that kept me going around in circles. But with each attack and fall I had, I learned something new, and I got back up again, and again, and again, each time going into each new battle a little bit more prepared. During this season, God was continuing to use me in ministry, but He had limitations on which doors He would open, while others, I knew He was keeping shut until I was ready and fully surrendered (this is where the radical obedience would later come in to play). So although I was finding purpose in the direction of my “calling”, I knew my heart had hardened a bit and that there were blessings and opportunities being hindered by my lack of complete surrender. I remember a big prayer of mine during this time was “God, please give me joy, the JOY of the Lord. I know I love you, but I don’t feel I exude your Joy the way I see it manifest in other believers’ countenance, please let others see that Joy when they see me”.

In May of 2022, I began a study series at Roaring Eagles Ministry which at that time was based out of Chino California. God had actually led me to this Ministry in 2019 where I visited to hear Prophet Rob Sanchez minister. I would later take SOAR school of prophecy led by the Prophet out of this “home church”. I then started attending Friday nights somewhat regularly the past year and a half or so where Pastor Carlos Becceril taught the Word of God like I had never been taught before. It was in May where Pastor Carlos started a series “Renewing Your Mind” which would transform my mind, heart, and Spirit all together. This past summer of 2022, I had found myself nearing the end of this cycle. I was at a point where I was done not living out my full potential in God’s purpose for me. In July, I was at Refuge Church in Rancho Cucamonga, once again visiting to hear Prophet Rob Sanchez. While waiting for service to begin, God spoke to me through the song “Slow Down” by Jonathan Ogden. God was telling me to “Slow Down”. “I want do a work in you but I need you to slow down and listen so I can give you direction” the Lord revealed to me. There are things I cannot control such as God’s timing, and when He opens doors and closes off others, or when He is ready to bring you in to a new season, but I knew I could control myself, self-control, a fruit of the spirit in fact. ‘”Obedience will be the key to unlocking your Kingdom’s purpose” and “Worship brings Healing” were two solid words God gave me back in the Summer and He showed me things I needed to cut off, sever, and surrender, if I were to experience true Joy and walk in complete freedom. “And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.” Matthew 5:30.

I surrendered. With those two powerful, audible, and precise words from God, I surrendered it all. I devoted time each morning in the Secret place, in prayer, praise & Worship, and the Word. I repented and finally understood that God really had forgiven me and that His plans for me are better than my own. Holy Spirit stirred up a fresh fire in me and I began walking in Freedom like I had never experienced before. I finally had the Joy of the Lord, evident by confirmation of those who have seen me since and said they see the joy of God all over me. That’s where I’m at today, October 1st 2022. I am walking in a new freedom and Joy like never before. God has began pouring so much into me, downloading sermons, illustrations, spiritual strategies, prophetic words, and secrets, so much so that I started 5 journals for various categories so as not to lose or forget what God is showing me and speaking to me. I just returned from Washington D.C. last week where I joined Changed Movement to share our childhood stories and Speak Out against conversion therapy bans, religious freedom, Equality Act, and trans issues, standing up to protect our nations children. Later this month, I’ll be heading to Atlanta with some of our SoCal overcomers from our New Hope/White Stones Ministry to join Freedom March. This year, my sister will be joining me, I could not be more stoked. Our ministry here is growing and I’ve gotten locked in Abundant Living Family Church where I’m currently taking their Growth Track class so I can then be of service to my church body. Although the dirty devils minions have been attacking me since D.C., life today is very good. I know there are tough days ahead spiritually, but I’ve learned to let God fight my battles, afterall, victory is already His. Please continue to keep me in prayer through the remainder of this year as I feel this year end will be significant in the spiritual realm. Please message me here as well with any questions or prayer requests as I am here to bring you hope and want to do whatever I can to bring truth with love and understanding to anyone who might have questions about my journey. I am super excited about this blog relaunch and will be much more diligent to share with you some key experiences, lessons, and revelations from God as He permits. Thank you for being a part of my journey. Stay blessed and prayed up. Kindly, Michael.

Catching A Burning Ember From My Grandfather’s Flame


My grandfather, Francisco “Frank” Navarro, or Opa (German for grandpa), as our family called him, passed away earlier this year in March of 2019. He met my Oma (grandma) in Germany in the 1950’s while stationed there in active duty for the United States Army during World War 2. My grandparents traveled the United Sates and had 6 children together, my mother Marina, is the eldest. My Oma gave her life to God in the late 70’s and my Opa gave his life to Christ shortly thereafter. In the early 80’s, my grandparents who were members of Praise Chapel Christian Fellowship in Ontario, California, were sent out to open a church in Northern California in a city called Hayward. A year later, they were called out to the mission field and were sent back to the city they had first met and lived together when they were married to pastor a church in Germany. Growing up In the 80’s was interesting for me, a good interesting. I was born and dedicated as a baby into Praise Chapel Ontario in 1980, the same congregation my grandparents had been sent out of . I grew up with a strong relationship with Jesus and knew my church to be like family to me. After all, my Opa and Oma were pastors from the church, my mom was involved with children’s ministry alongside my aunt who was also the church’s secretary for almost 30 years. I had uncles and my father who were also part of the usher team at the church for various lengths of time as well, although, the men in my life, did not appear to be as spiritually strong as the women in my life, as most of them struggled with addictions among other spiritual battles and never remained consistent in their faiths for long extended periods of time.

I knew from a young age that there was something about me that set me apart from other boys in my family and peer groups. The “rough and tumble” boys of my era, fascinated with sports, skateboards, G.I. Joe figurines and Legos, contracted strongly against my interest in puff painting, arts & crafts, Care Bear toys, Rainbow Brite, and treasure trolls. I found being the only boy in my private grade school art and t-shirt making clubs, while my male cousins who i attended school seemed a world apart from me as they spent their extracurricular time playing tether ball, basketball, and kickball, out on the blacktop with all the rest of the guys in my school. It didn’t bother me much, except for a few times older snobby girls teased me for being the only guy in these groups. I recall one time a girl named Janet, bullied me to the point of tears, she didn’t understand the weight of her words on my impressionable young mind and ended up apologizing at the orders of the school office aids. I had Jesus though, and a handful of female influences in my life who valued me and my interests. My mom, my aunt Melinda, my sister Leah, and my cousins Naomi and Jasmine always made me feel special and enjoyed doing the things i liked to do like craft work, baking, and putting together dance skits. Whether it be choreographing a dance to Amy Grant (my moms favorite Christian Artist of that era), dressing up as Aladdin and Princess Jasmine to sing for the other kids at church, or baking sugar cookies and piping the icing on a random afternoon, I had a group of family members who i felt i had some sense of security with.


My dad has always been present in my life. I knew when i was young that my father loved me, however, i had bitterness and built up resentment towards him for various reasons. In my adolescent years into my early teens, I understood that my dad had a rough upbringing, but did not understand why he sometimes treated my mom the way that he did or why he struggled with certain issues. Pornography in the house was a big issue as was drug use and alcoholism. My dad had bouts of anger and rage stemmed from his being drunk and/or under the influence of methamphetamine which many times led to him taking off overnight or for several nights in a week. At times his anger manifested physically to the point of pushing, shoving, restraining, throwing objects, etc. It seemed that every time, his anger resulted in horrible verbal and mental abuse abuse to my mother. There were times growing up that I swore i hated my dad. I had no strong spiritual men to turn to during those times. My only strong spiritual influence in my life at that time, my Opa was what seemed like millions of miles away doing mission work in Germany. Him and my Oma would visit once a year and I cherished those visits. I would look forward to hearing about their ministry work and hearing stories of their street outreaching, those stories really intrigued me. I saw my Opa as a hero as I would hear of how he’d witness at the bonhoff (train) stations amidst neo-nazi groups who would still conjure together during those years. I looked up to my grandparents, who were at the Berlin wall in 1989 when the wall was torn down, and I would later and to this day revel at pictures of Opa and Oma standing at the Berlin wall, chisel in hand, tearing down the wall. My Opa always talked about Jesus and taught me and all my cousins important lessons in faith from our earliest memories. From him, and my Oma, i knew from a young age about spiritual warfare, the reality of satan and his tactics, the influence of worldly music and toys, and the importance of salvation, being born again and living for Christ. “You gotta be ready at all times Mikey Poo” my Opa would say, “We never know when Jesus is coming back, so we gotta be ready.” Another thing he would always tell me that always stood out to me growing up, and is so important to my testimony and in my walk today is “You gotta be RADICAL for Jesus Mikey, Radical! There’s no other way.”


My Opa and Oma moved back to the states in the early 90’s. I was now a teenager and struggled with same-sex attraction. I had stopped going to church around the age of 14, and started exploring my sexual curiosity with other young guys and men via the underground rave scene of the 90’s here in southern California. Originally I began this course of my life around the age of 12 or 13 with my cousin Eileen as we would dress up with funky clothes made of fur and fabric flared and Jnco brand pants which completely covered our shoes. We’d adorn ourselves with gas masks, backpacks made out of emptied cardboard Tide detergent boxes, and dozens of pony beaded necklaces charmed with pacifiers, whistles and sesame street characters. We were known as “groovers” in the Inland Empire rebel party dance scene- funky dressed, hallucinogenic drug taking, dancers and had found a circle of friends who “preached” P.L.U.R. (Peace, Love, Unity, Respect) which introduced us to the underground warehouse and desert rave scene. The fun , sexual encounters, and drug taking lasted until I began having very surreal spiritual LSD trips. The fun trips of acid use were now resulting in deep spiritual convictions every time i would drop , to the point where i stopped taking the drug all together. I just couldn’t bear the “bad” spiritual trips any more, looking back, i know God had his hand in this situation the entire time, despite not serving Him or living my life for Him at the time. During all of this chaos, my Opa continued to minister to me and pray for me. He never judged me for my lifestyle choices, he never judged my friends, although he hurt for me, he still loved me. An addiction to meth from the age of 19 to 24, saw my life spiral more downward, i grew distant from my family, and my grandparents. False promises to visit them followed by excuses for absences from family events seemed to be the norm for me. The devil had his hands around my throat and I was believing his lies. Lies that told me I’d always be gay. Lies that told me I would always be an addict. Lies that my family didn’t like me and talked about me my back even though it was I who chose not to participate in family events due to my state of mind. Lies that I was worthless. Lies that I had no future. Lies, lies, lies, the devil is a liar. I finally cleaned up and stopped the meth use in 2005. I thought my life would get better, but unresolved, deep rooted issues from my past still surfaced and manifested in unhealthy sexual choices and life decisions. I replaced my addiction to meth with Alcohol and found myself now drinking to numb my pain. I would call my Opa and Oma for prayer when I would hit rock bottoms: loss of jobs, spiritual emptiness, wrecked vehicles, in times of desperation. My Opa must’ve heard me repent to Jesus numerous times and ask for forgiveness , each time asking God to come back into my life. These moments of “empty salvation” never lasted long, as i was only seeking salvation for a quick fix to dire situations. The Lord knew my heart, and I wasn’t ready. Although His hand was and had always been on and over my life, it was free will that take me to darker and emptier places than the bottom i thought I had reached. Regardless, my Opa still prayed for me. He would always tell me that God had plans and a purpose for my life, that when i was finally ready to give up the world and live radically for Christ that then I would see what the Lord’s plans for my future was, but I had to meet God halfway. Through it all, my Opa, the strong, spiritual, God fearing, soldier of Christ that he was, along with my Oma. kept on pressing forward with their prayers over my life.


In 2018, at the age of 37, My life had brought me to that bottom of all bottoms that I never imagined could’ve existed. In October 2017, I had moved out of a house where I was sharing a room with a cousin whose alcoholism gave my alcoholism a run for it’s money . The spiritual warfare in that household was too intense for me and I had finally moved out, sleeping on the floor in my parents house, until finally renting a room from a neighbor of my folks’ renting out that November. I drank my way through that New Year into 2018 and my drinking alone in my rented room in Ontario, California had reached an all time high. A personal situation at work in April 2018 involving having sexual relationships with a “curious” male co-worker, resulted in me being suspended from work while the situation was being investigated. I was hooking up daily with random men I would meet off of hook-up apps in my neighborhood and surrounding areas. I had switched drinking whiskey to Vodka in attempts to control my alcoholism as i had become immune to Jack Daniels brand whiskey and could drink a 750 ml bottle like it was a bottle of water. I thought I’d slow down on vodka but found myself consuming literally a gallon of vodka through the day, every day. Out of control would be an understatement in regards to my drinking. I was to the point where I was throwing up blood, my eyes were yellowing, my nail beds were deteriorating, and I couldn’t produce saliva to properly breakdown food. I developed a strange disorder known as Pica disorder which caused cravings that would only be satisfied by biting down on tiny pieces of crushed up Chlorox bleach tablets. I had replaced eating with drinking and my body was shutting down on me. To top things off the spiritual battlefield around me was under intense warfare as i would hear demonic voices outside my window at all hours of the evening.  It was May 28th, 2018 where I had decided I had enough. I was done. I was so sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was so upset and disappointed with myself for letting alcohol control my life the way it had. In those hours of desperation, exhaustion, and spiritual brokeness, i cried out to God to deliver me from the alcoholism. I told God that I had finally had enough, that I didn’t want to lose my life over the excessive drinking. I promised God that if He took away the cravings, the desire to drink , that I would live my life for Him. This time around, my prayer was different than all the “empty salvation” prayers of the past. This time I meant it, this time, I wanted it, not just for the quick fix, but for a lifetime. This time, my heart and soul cried out with every ounce of feeling I had left in me. This time, the Lord knew my request was real. This time, the Lord delivered me. And like just like that, over a 2 day process, ALL and any craving, desire, or itch to drink was completely delivered from my body. I had no withdrawals like i had experienced in the past. No tremors, no hallucinations, no shaking, no dry heaving, no pain in my gut, no throwing up, absolutely nothing. The spirit of alcoholism had been completely cast out and delivered from my body, and I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt, that it was God, and only God, who had healed, delivered and restored me, completely.


“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” -Matthew 6:33, was the scripture my Opa gave me many years ago and always spoke over me. He would recall it literally every single time I would see him. The days, and weeks following my surrender to back to Christ in May 2018 and being born again were so spirit filled. God opened so many doors to me, doors I thought I’d never see open again began to swing open. Everything from finances, work, employment, education, health, mins, spirit, knowledge, you name it, God showed up and showed off. God made his existence and love for me so real, that through His grace, I decided to walk away from my identity i had founded through my homosexual sexuality for 25+ years and find my identity through my Creator, Jesus Christ. As Christopher Yuan might say, I’m Holy-sexual, haha. So much has been added to me these past 17 months being a new creation in Christ. Perhaps one of my biggest and most profound takeaways from me giving my life back to God, were the 10 months I got to spend with my Opa being that new creation and walking in the light. My Opa had prayed for me many years, he always knew God had a plan for me, his loved grandson. I have lost a few family members during my addiction years, years I wasn’t living for Christ, and I had some regrets. Regrets for not being in the hospital with my aunt Julia for example because I was out on a multiple day meth binge, returning home sfter a few days to hear about her passing and wishing I had been sober minded to be there for her. Or regrets for not being in the right state of mind to spend more time with my beloved aunt Alice before she passed, her heart was so big, but I allowed my monster of addiction to be bigger. But those 10 months with my Opa, I know it was was by the grace again of only God, that he gave me those 10 months with my Opa, such a precious gift and blessing. Over the course of those 10 months, between July 2019 and up until his Passing March 8, 2019, I got to spend some great times with my Opa. I know, that he knew that this time, my salvation was the real deal. I could see it in his eyes, sometimes through the holding back of tears, how proud he was of his Mikey-poo for finally getting what salvation meant and the importance of salvation really was. I got to share stories with my Opa of how God was confirming my faith in my life. I got to make my Opa laugh like I would when I was younger. I got to share with Opa about my plans for joining other overcomers who once identified as homosexual and now live for Christ and how I would be joining them for Freedom Marches, marching for victory in Jesus Christ. I got to learn so many tools to add to the treasure trove of tools I had already gained through my Opa’s spiritual knowledge and wealth. I got to pray with my Opa as he prayed purpose, a future, and a calling over my life again. I got a chance to show how excited I was for having Jesus in my life and affirm to my hero that “I have no choice now, but to be RADICAL for Jesus”.  The Lord called my Opa home earlier this year, he called my hero home peacefully. Although I wish I had more time to spend with my Opa being a sold out soldier for Christ, I know where he is, whose he is, and that I’ll see him again soon. Besides,  Opa wouldn’t want to come back to this earthly world now that he’s in his kingdom paradise. My Opa leaves behind a powerful yet humble legacy of being sold-out and radical for Jesus. He was a trailblazer in his earlier years of street ministry, bullhorn in hand, jumping on top of trashcans to witness to the addicts, alcoholics, and non-believers in Ontario and everywhere else ministry led him to. His fire, so strong, set off so many embers along it’s course of life. Like embers of any wildfire, sometimes we have no idea where the winds might carry an ember off to, only to start another wildfire somewhere we’d never have imagined. I do know this, I was one of the lucky ones, for lack of a better term. I was fortunate, and destined to catch an ember from my Opa’s flame, and I made a vow to my God, to never allow the enemy put out this fire that’s been set ablaze in my spirit . I will ALWAYS be a RADICAL soldier for Christ and His kingdom.

My Testimony


My name is Michael Martinez. I am a 38 year-old born again Christian residing in Ontario, California. I surrendered my life back to God in May of this 2018. I was born in 1980 and spent my early childhood years growing up in a local grass roots church. During my early years in the Church, i was dedicated to God and had a deep loving relationship with The Father. My years growing up in the church saw powerful years of revival and and super-natural anointing’s and healing’s led by the Holy Spirit. My life as a young child of God, although presented with troubles in the household, had a deep sense of security, love, and peace, that only God was able to give me. I was introduced to porn at a very young age via my father’s stashed pornography and my cousins who watched it. I had a conflict of knowing that porn hurt my mother so I did not like to see women being objectified through porn, but was fascinated by the males role and bodies in the smut. I was growing confused, sexually, and growing apart from God.

My teenage years introduced my spirit to a world of rebellion and curiosity starting around the age of 12 where i found a connection and escape through “House” music via the underground I.E. “rebel parties” and “Happy Hardcore/Techno” music via the Los Angeles underground parties of the early and mid 1990’s. During my years of exploration, i found myself turning towards the LGBT lifestyle. I had thoughts of homosexuality in younger years, and came to a place where i honestly believed that i had been born Gay from the get go (something i even believed up until specific revelation from God in recent months). My early adult years saw my lifestyle turn into a darker place of lifestyle choices and unhealthy sexually driven addictions, accompanied by addiction to Marijuana, Meth, and Alcohol. My spirit which was once comforted, loved and found solace in Gods grace, had now somehow been taken over by a dark force powered by snares of manipulation, lies, and ultimate deceit and betrayal brought on by the Prince of darkness himself.

Fast forward to last year, May of last year to be exact. I was just living, thats all, breathing and living, spirit-less. I was at a place where i was not happy at all anymore. It’s funny when i tell people this because all anyone ever saw or knew of me for the past 20+ years was a mask wearing happy-go-lucky Mikey. Always laughing (while inwardly hurting), always smiling (on the outside), always there to lift other peoples spirit (while killing my own), always keeping it real (while being the biggest fake), and always standing up for Truth (while living a lie). And when i thought LIFE coudln’t get anymore crappier than it was, God showed me just how low my bottom would really be. That bottom in May, was all of my hurt and frustrations, found at the bottom of countless bottles of Whiskey and Vodka, digesting tiny pieces of crushed up bleach tablets to satisfy a strange craving caused by nutrients my body was lacking. I was never one to ever think about committing suicide, but in May, i was at a place where i was actually okay with dying a death from alcohol. My body was failing, my heart was hurting, and my spiritual life was dead.

…And then God happened! In that place of ultimate darkness, i surrendered EVERYTHING to God. I cant explain how or what it was, but i know i was done with it all. I was done with the addictions- to drugs, to alcohol, to sexual immorality, to self harm, to low self esteem. I was done with the emptiness- the reject, the pain, the sorrow, the loneliness, the lack of self worth, the lack of having purpose. I was ready to do anything God was to ask of me, if he could just take it all away and give me the peace and love i had known when i was that little kid in church growing up and dealing with life on Gods terms! I was ready to come back to the Father, ready to put the world behind me and the cross before me. When i called on God this time-he answered. I was delivered literally overnight from the alcohol and and from the desire of living a homosexual lifestyle. It’s still something new to me, but i wouldn’t have it any other way. My God is so amazingly awesome. That peace and joy i have come to know again is beyond words. The most blessed part of my testimony is the finding of my purpose in serving others for the desire of winning hearts to Gods kingdom.

In March of 2019, our family patriarch, my grandpa, or “Opa” as we called him passed away. He left behind a legacy rooted in pastoral missionary ministry over seas and was an integral part of planting so many seeds amongst my family. With his passing, came a deeper desire for me to not let his words and wisdom he shared my entire life not be lost or forgotten. He always told me ,”Mikey, you’ve gotta be RADICAL for Jesus”. And that’s how I am now living my life. I was always radical for all the wrong reasons and causes, it is now time to be radical for Jesus! In May, I attended my first Freedom March in Washington D.C. Meeting other radical soldiers for the Kingdom has encouraged me to stay strong and keep sharing my testimony, that of Gods love and redemption and how he took me from broken to chosen.

Works In Progress, Stay Tuned

Hi friends. I know, I know, it’s been a few months since my last update to you all. God has been doing so much in my life this past year, its crazily amazing. God is so good. I’ve been putting together a few updates as well as a couple poems which I’ll be sharing with you very soon. I have so much to catch you up on such as the passing of my grandfather “Opa” this past March and the legacy he left behind for his grandchildren, my first Freedom March which I attended in Washington D.C., God’s confirmations in my journey through The Living Word and Holy Spirit, how everything’s been going at my job, and like a mentioned, a couple short poetry writings I’ve revisited which speak volumes to my journey today. So stay posted, content coming soon. In the meantime I encourage anyone struggling with same-sex attraction or who has a friend or family member that is to KEEP praying. Remember, after 25 years, it was my family’s prayers through Christ, over my life which made a big impact on this prodigal son returning home. So stay tuned, I’ll be sharing more very soon. Stay blessed and prayed up. -Mikey Likey

Pressing Forward

I find my strength in Christ who continues to strengthen me more and more each day. It’s not easy, but I WILL continue to press forward and share the gospel to whoever God brings in my path. It’s my purpose, now my passion as well as the calling over my life. Sharing my testimony more each day, I realize that Gods call in my life is very specific and something I will continue to grow in and unravel. No doubt, there are “rough” days, days where I’m not in the best of mood or days where my shine doesn’t glisten as bright as the day before. I have friends, co-workers, and a small handful of family members even who have doubted, mocked, and cursed my new found glory and redemption through the Father. I’ve had some block me from social media, dig up my past in hope of bringing shame to me and my testimony, spread false lies about the works I am doing in Gods name, accuse my spiritual family of teaching hate, etc…and I realize that this is something that’s going to continue to happen, but today, I am okay with that.quotephoto5c2387117716067724210033122.jpg My Creator sustains me each and every day and brings me hope, purpose, and power. Power to endure negative hearts and spirits, a purpose to spread God’s ultimate message of love, and a hope of leading other lost souls to redemption and salvation through The Great I Am, The ultimate Almighty. I WILL not stumble nor falter. My identity is found in the embrace of the Almighty, His love is the only mans love I really and truly need. A love that surpasses all understanding, a love so deep and personal to me. Some dont understand, and I get it, I really do. It’s not that they deliberately try to undermine me, they just don’t fully understand, which is why I continue to pray for them amidst their mockery and verbal assaults. I’ll keep it real with you , at this point in my life Its hard to label myself as “heterosexual” or having a desire to seek after women. And at the same time, homosexuality is an aspect of my life before Christ which no longer resonates with my soul. Am I sexually attracted to women? No. Are there still moments of weakness where inappropriate thoughts about men enter my mind? Sure. The difference though is my hearts desire. A desire which no longer seeks an identity based on sexuality, rather a much deeper and personal desire to find my identity which is found in God.img_20190225_234913_1878140458894617050097.jpg The truth of it all really lies in the peace, the knowing, and the spiritual growing , rooted in the gospel. Gods calling on my life surpasses all physical desires at this point of my life, and to be honest, i completely LOVE it. My desire is now on a spiritual level which has no boundaries or limitations as it is centered on Christ. To know i was designed with a heart to love others, and to now finally be honest with myself to start working on deep rooted issues of my past have really brought great revelation as to why i lived my life the way i did, full of resentment, pain, anger, no self-worth, and no hope of a happy future. Now, i am overwhelmed and so grateful to be born again with a real self love for myself, a desire to live purposefully, and a clarity of mind to seek God and his righteousness. Stay blessed and prayed up. God loves you as much as he loves me. You are special. You have worth and value. What the enemy saw as broken, God always and continues to see as CHOSEN. Stay blessed, and prayed up. God transforms and brings the most bestest redemption ever, I promise you, as I’m living proof. Stay prayed up friends. -MikeyLikey


Strength In My Weakness


Hello my Broken 2 Chosen family. Happy 2019. I know it’s been a month since I’ve last posted. The end of 2018 came and went so quickly, as I’m sure it did for many of you as well. On top of the hustle and bustle of the holidays, I found myself having a little bit of a “writer’s block” recently. So much has been going on in regards to me finding strength through my testimony since you last hears from me. I’ve been wanting to post and share where I’m at right now in my faith walk but couldn’t put it to paper these last couple weeks. Fortunately, last night, a very special friend shared 2 Cor. 2: 1-10 – Paul’s Vision and His Thorn, with our prayer chat group and it really struck a marvelous chord with my spirit. The reality and truth of me finding strength in my weakness couldn’t be more pertinent as it is right now in my life.


You know , finding freedom through Gods redemption has been a genuinely beautiful transformation for my mind, body, and soul. It’s also been a very humbling experience as well. It was literally only 4 or so months ago that I was beginning to find the strength and courage to really open my life up to everyone in regards to me leaving behind the life of homosexuality. I would have never imagined , even months ago, the strength I’d have, to proclaim Victory through Christ in this area of my life. I knew then, that I’d face adversary from friends, family and coworkers. I knew it wasn’t going to be a walk in the park. I knew I’d see tough days and face hard moments. I knew-or at least I thought I knew, but let me be honest, I had no idea! The physical battles I’ve faced recently fail in comparison to the spiritual warfare that awaited my testimony in the Worlds trenches. Dealing with the criticism, mockery, dis-belief, and zealousness of others as it pertained to my new walk with Christ, which chose to leave a gay lifestyle, has had a few hard moments. But, that’s all they were and will be in the future-moments. Moments which dont and will never lead me back into my sin for multiple reasons. Most importantly, God has been by my side and has had my back so much, that nothing they throw at me can even dent, let alone penetrate, my armor of Christ. Moreover,  my Heavenly Fathers love, grace, and mercy has given me so much insight and discernment in regards to seeing the pain and loneliness of these attackers. His love for me, has given me a heart to want to love them and pray for them, for they know not what they do. Now, what I have come to find that has left me beat-up, exhausted, weakened in moments I suppose, is the spiritual warfare aspect of this whole redemption song.


I had heard of the term spiritual warfare throughout my life. I understood it to be a battle of good vs. evil in the spiritual realm. I had heard family and friends talk about a spiritual battle that existed, but living my life in sin, it was something I never encountered since satan had already proclaimed victor of my soul in those dark times. He didnt need to wage spiritual warfare on me for I had already been defeated. That all changed when God proclaimed true Victory over my life. My ABBA knew the battle was always in the Kingdoms favor, so the moment I proclaimed my stake in the Heavenly Kingdom this past year, the devil began his desperate attempts at trying to use others to attack my testimony. When these attacks didnt work, the devils realization of my soul belonging to Christ and the rebuilding of my temple for the Kingdom caused him to launch an attack on my spirit in the spiritual world. I now knew the feeling of this “spiritual warfare” and learned after the first battle last year that I was going to really need to equip myself for the next round. Satan didnt knock me out, but he sure put me through a gauntlet of assaults that left me weary, exhausted, and drained. It’s hard to put into words, this spiritual warfare that is going on. It was one thing living in my sin, I was hopeless  and defeated as the devil had gotten me to error on the side of righteousness. But the grueling pressing in the moving forward of my journey is different. Theres an unseen presence of assaults manifested through the day to day. They come in the guise of angry and bitter coworkers who verbally attack and accuse to a point of overwhelming stress and breakdowns. They come in the forms of family members seeking escape through the very own chains that held me captive of my sins for so long. They manifest in warfare amongst my closest members of family and friends, who seem to be in the midst of the same warzone , just different battles. They come as attacks on my Grandfather’s health-attacking the General of Goodness in Hope’s that by taking him out, that the faith of my Grandmother and elders in our precious family , might be lost. They come as mind manipulators, blinding the hearts and confusing the eyes with mental games, where even the strong in Faith, fail to see the wrong doings of their Nazareth-narcissism . The battles and attacks of spiritual warfare comes in every way unimaginable,  and although its draining, it’s all in Gods hand, and in Gods hand, lies the Victory.


The victory has already come for me. In May 2018, my ultimate surrender, Victory claimed my soul and God presented me with my future, my calling.  The devil is so mad. I have found my purpose. I see Gods plan so clearly for me now and the outline for my life-my battle plan. I have now had my taste of spiritual warfare, the heat of its spice has nothing on the taste of my Fathers Milk and Honey. God has allowed me to not only sharpen my sword with the living word for battle, but He has been equipping me through reading, courses, encounters, dreams, listenings, people, the church, and the Holy spirit-with tools and weapons for the next round of spiritual warfare that Lucifer may throw at me. He has been strengthening me and my testimony to be able to stand strong and not grow weary as I continue to testify all of the great things the Father has done for me. God has given me new eyes to discern character, new ears to hear even his faintest of voices when He is speaking to me, a new mouth to speak righteously and genuinely from a place of surrender and authenticity,  a new heart to have compassion and love others, and a new desire-to win souls over for the Glory of the Kingdom. I’ve shared with my cousins,  other disciples of the Kingdom , that I really feel as if 2018 was a year of transformation . Our message to us leading up to the end of 2018, “Be still, and know that I am God”. 2019 I feel will be a year of warfare for the Kingsoms glory where Praise and Worship will be our battle cry going into the spiritual battlefields of work, ministry,  home-life, relationships, and family structure. It’s not a scary warfare though, it’s one we are charging into with a strong anointing and assuredness as we know victory is Gods. I am excited to be in the army of God for the Good fight. My words for 2019, “Do NOT grow weary”. With 2020, we believe in a 20/20 vision, where our visions , plans, and prayers will manifest physically for the eye to see. To see the Greatness of God and all his Power and Majesty.  God loves you my friend. He sent his only son to die for OUR sins and He knew us before we were conceived. Don’t let the devils lies keep you hopeless or lonely.  He has a purpose for you and will sustain you whole-heartedly.  Stay blessed and prayed up. -Mikey Likey

Continue reading “Strength In My Weakness”

Gaining Strength Through My Testimony


Hi Friends. Mikey Likey here. Just settling in from work this evening and reflecting on last nights Praise and Worship /Prayer I attended at a local faith based church here in the city of Claremont, Ca. My testimony, my personal story , of how Jesus freed this 38 year-man from addiction, self-destruction, and also the homosexual lifestyle has been something so precious, and empowering to me since giving my life back and surrendering my all to God in May of this year. You know, after surrendering my complete pain and hurt to God this year, it’s really been a pretty crazy , rapid, sometimes overwhelming Change and Spiritual growth experience for me. I feel that this time, in my surrendering, God heard the authentic cries from my spirits darkest regions, and it’s as if , actually it IS the reason, God has been so powerfully present in all aspects of my life now. I know that He knows, that I am now ready,  to fully serve him in all that I do,  and that means sharing the truth and boldness that finds sanctuary in my testimony.

I could sit here for hours and think about all the “why’s” and wonders of my journey. Why was I brought up in a household where my world, my mother endured what she did in her faith-walk living in a family structure with the obstacles that , how I viewed it, at times broke her spirit? Why didnt I have a healthy relationship with my father, or my ideal relationship I as a young child imagined it should have been? Why did God make me attracted to men? Why did I not have lustful desires towards women like my cousins who I watched pornography with did? Why did I act “differently” then how I was taught boys should act? Why did no other boys have the crushes on guys as I did, or did they? Why didnt I like sports, or better, why did I hate sports? Why wasn’t I athletically built? Why did I like to secretly play with my sisters barbies and design them clothes when my dad would be off coaching her soccer team? Why did I like arts and crafts, poems, and singing? Why did I have a flare for fun fashion? Why was I born GAY?

PhotoGrid_1544685847017As if my same sex attraction didnt confuse, sadden and scare me enough in it’s own complexity, I found out in my teen years I had an addictive personality with a taste for a lot of things un-satisfyingly delicious. My addictive personality manifested into full blown forms of addiction. In my teen years, I grew up in the Rave Techno music scene. I found that the culture was so welcoming to the misfits of society- the loners, the freaks,  the weirdos, the free spirited, the hippies, the unique, the gay, ME! In addition to it’s open doors, the Rave seen also introduced and enticed me to a new world of hallucinogenic drugs like acid (LSD), mushrooms, and ecstacy (MDMA). And my taste for the forbidden only got worse. My years following High-school discovered the demon of addiction in the form of meth. What started as a bump here and there turned into a waged out spiritual and mental war powered by crystal meth and the not-so- beautiful disaster it spews from its glass pipe. That addiction had a threshold over me for about 5 to 6 years until lifes circumstances led me to a point of surrender and God delivered me from that hold in 2005.

From 2005 til this year 2018, nothing really changed. Sure I was delivered from the meth, and I gave God all the glory, but I also made a false commitment. My spirit did not thrive, my addiction only transferred from the meth to marijuana and my biggest demon, since the meth monster, Alcohol. I never felt bad or convicted much, until later, about smoking pot, but the alcohol really took me for a loop. Looking back, I see that my overcoming to such a strong poison as meth, only allowed satan to trick my thought process into not realizing the true torment and despair in alcohol. In May, my month of ultimate surrender, and the point in which Gods promised Michael returned , alcoholism had brought me to the point of throwing up blood, yellowed eyes, deteriorating nail beds, trouble breathing, and off heartbeats. I was literally at a place being okay with thought of losing my life to alcoholism,  my life didnt see any hope or future, and I was in pain. I was lonely. I wasn’t finding happiness in my hookups with men anymore. I was tired of seeing my self as a 50 year old gay man visiting the WeHo bars every weekend only to be outshined by the younger flesh in the lifestyle. I had never found true love. I never knew love. I never even had a serious relationship.  I hated myself. I hated wearing 2 faces. I hated having to pretend to be the always happy-go-lucky lush at my job. I was tired of always singing and uplifting others when inside I was so spiritually dead. It wasnt me, it was so fake, and no one even realised, except God.

So, in May, God happened.  I cant explain exactly what, but I know, that God knew, that IT was time. So I surrendered. To me, and to my story, that surrender meant leaving the alcohol,  and any substances that altered my mind, behind me. I wanted to seek HIM more. I wanted to read His word more and I wanted to remember what I would be reading and I didnt want any substances to cloud or jog my memory, it’s so good now to soak it all in. My surrender also meant leaving the life of a homosexual man and sexually hooking up with men behind me. The cross before me, the world behind me. Now, my surrender does not mean I’ve turned my back on my LGBTQ community, friends, and family. I am just at a place where I’m choosing to not act on my own personal lustful and Immoral temptations, such I do not need to go into detail, but for me, yes, ugly and immoral. Call it celibate if you need to tag an identity to it, I identify now as a Man of Christ. I do not judge or preach against anyone, especially my gay family. How could I? I am that heart, I was just so broken at one point in time , that now I just want to share the hope and love I found in Jesus Christ with anyone who may be broken or hurt, for any reason. And in sharing my hope, I am also not trying to change anyone. People may say, in fact, that I’ve changed. And guess what? I have. And for the better. How can anyone close to me not see the change? In my giving my life back and proclaiming Gods victory. In my weight loss journey since May, down over 65 lbs. In my recovery from alcohol-now over 6 months alcohol free, literally delivered overnight. In my personal goals such as going back to school in January, getting my licence ,  and learning to play the guitar for #praiseandworship. So, it’s not that I’m trying to make anyone change, rather, I want to share how Gods love changed me so beautifully inward in Hope’s others who seek Him, will find what I have in Christ.

PhotoGrid_1544685963471And now, my journey, growing strong in God and totally realizing his calling on my life, finds me in a season on strengthening my testimony as it will be my weapon, my shield, reflecting Gods light in modern day real-life spiritual warfare. Before May, I NEVER told a group of Faith believers (outside of my family), my battle with homosexuality. Sure, I shared my battle with addiction to drugs and alcohol with them. I also shared my battles of depression, hurt, and low self esteem with believers. Those were easy things for me to open up to as I’ve heard others in church countless times sharing these same struggles. But boy oh boy was it hard to share my struggle with homosexuality in church. First most, I NEVER heard any other member in church , especially another male in my age range openly express any struggle with SSA that I struggled with. I felt convicted in my own heart enough through Gods word and Gods conviction , the last thing I needed to hear from the church was that I was following Satan and destined to go to Hell. It’s TRUE what they say, a church is supposed to be like a hospital where hurt and spiritually broken people go to seek help from ones who understand their pain or can help bring them to a resolution, restoration, healing. But imagine being broken, and you, knowing your body, know you have symptoms that seem dire so you finally decide to seek medical attention. Now imagine going to seek medical attention, and before evaluating, talking to you, taking your bio or cat scan, running any tests or giving any counsel, the doctor tells you straight out the gate “You’re going to die”. What would you do? Some might choose to get a second opinion, whereas as sadly, others may take the doctors word , go home thinking they’re destined to die,  and never return to a hospital again. Well, that’s how it was with me expressing my struggle. Until I finally came back to Christ to get the Ultimate authority’s verdict over of my life. And guess what, With Him, that verdict is eternal lasting life.

And now, having found that new life, God has placed my seed at a church in Claremont. This Curch was introduced to me through a cousin of mine who invited me to come check out a 9 week study course that the church was hosting back in May called Alpha. Through this 9 week study, which for me was more like a holy ghost fueled rubber banded rocket journey into the unknown of pure truth and holiness of my new walk with God. In those 9 weeks I mustered up the strength to fully open up and be transparent with this group who are now more of a spiritual family to me. On the 9th and final night of the study, God spoke to me and I trusted him to lead me into sharing my journey.  My true testimony, everything from the hurt, addiction and poor lifestyles was shared that night, and another wall inside of me was broken down. That night propelled me into proclaiming my victory for now i am an overcomer through Christ. The connection with the church now finds me committing to tuesday night praise and prayer worship. That’s where i was last night, in that state of praise and worship. Spoken words by a leader of the church prompted the spirit in me to give my testimony to the group , the adults and elders whom weren’t in the Alpha session but are a part of the churches flock. I had not shared my story and testimony with them and it was time. I released again years of hurt and pain but the release was so quenching and filling. The members placed hands upon me, and I felt the presence of the holy spirit as well as the Fathers as anointing over my life as I asked them to pray that I find the words to express Gods agape love to others in need of hope and redemption without coming from a place of hypocriticism or mis understanding. I thank God for planting my seed to spiritually grow with this family. I feel as if the seed to an amazing strong oak has been planted. I feel the roots will be my new foundation in my new life with Christ and the fertilizer that’s been scattered is that of leven (as was mentioned last night ) which will cause a strong and powerful rising. And with the growth and strength of this mighty oak, seasons will come, and the leaves, seeds, and fruits of my testimony and labor will prosper and drift from the tree, scattering its hope amongst the lost who seek refuge in its branches and find hope and compassion in the extension of the oaks branches, for they know that God has given new life and strength i what was once a mess of tangled wilted branches.

PhotoGrid_1544672935622This is why it is so important to me to share my true testimony. This is why last night was so important for me. I am learning now, the power God shines through my testimony. My testimony will be vital and key in others unlocking lies and false truths they may find and see in themselves.  Every step I take in opening up and sharing my testimony is another foot in my purpose and steps in my walk with Christ. Now  is my time to strengthen my story, my realization of the Truth. This is me finding strength, in my testimony, from BROKEN TO CHOSEN. Stay blessed and prayed up. -Mikey Likey

Break Time

Good morning friends! As I sit here at work on my break, I still trip out on where my mindset is this morning compared to where I was mentally just 7 months ago and the 20+ years before that. Although I’m not in church this morning, the church is alive in ME this morning. It’s important for me to let all my #LGBT friends and family know that firsthand, my story, which now finds itself in a new chapter that chooses freely to no longer identify as a homosexual man, has NOTHING to do with any “ideas” or “religious” views being “forced” upon me. I’ve ALWAYS been an individual to go against the grain and not let what others think affect my views or beliefs. Nor, does my new freedom have anything to do with my fellow disciples in Christ in which whom I’ve chosen to befriend and grow closer bonds with. No one in my spiritual family has anything negative to say about the LGBTQ lifestyle , or any other individuals for that matter. They, like myself just want to simply share our stories, serve our Father, and show ANYONE who may be feeling alone, hurt, sad, miserable, unhappy, and empty ,the Love and Light God has freely given to us. God Loves You. Just as He has always loved me, I just never loved myself enough to let the Holy Spirit in. I’ve never been one to let what people say affect or change me either. I’ve always had a voice of my own, a LOUD one, and it is now my time to stop being radical about all things un-pure and un-holy, and to start being radical for Jesus Christ. We dont get to choose the road God has always intended for our lives. Sure, we may choose to take the wide and broad open road of our liking and ill-sought desires, but as I found, with addiction, the Gay lifestyle, and the lack of Love for myself, THAT road just leads to emptiness. It is finally now, that as I choose to take the strait and narrow road, that I can perfectly see what’s  ahead for me, a life of complete, pure Love, peace, hope, purpose and Understanding. Please share this post with anyone who may need to be encouraged today, there is hope, even for a broken to chosen, 38 year old, former addict and homosexual. God is good! If you have any private questions or need personal prayer, feel free to send me private direct message by hitting the contact tab in the menu. Stay blessed and Prayed up! -Mikey Likey